Monday, February 22, 2010

Saturday night and Monday morning

Saturday night, we had a sitter for 5 hours and we got to have some date activities! My friend watched Quint at her house, so we could hang out at our own house. I was rather upset last week (not sure why) to realize that have never done date-type things. People keep telling us that we need a date now that Quint is 5 months old, but we never have. And we don't like date things. Eating out at a nice restaurant is ok, but one of my husband's personality quirks is that he doesn't speak while at a restaurant. He doesn't want anyone to overhear us, so we sit there in silence. How boring, and how sad. We don't like paying $25 for movie tickets and we hardly ever like the same movies.

There for several days, I went through this whole huge thing of "what do we have in common, do we have anything in common, what does this say about the future of our marriage, why is it that we don't do things together like...ever, oh no, is our marriage headed down the tubes".

Perhaps there was some melodrama involved. Or some winter blues mixed with postpartum something.

But after 2 or 3 long talks, I realized that A) we're both very cheap and can't enjoy something if it costs too much and B) of course we do things together, but they just don't cost money. And C) I don't suddenly need to fit in to everyone else's idea of dating just because they said so. Whoever "they" are.

So, my friend watched Quint at her house so we could do some together things at home. My mom seemed to think this only meant sex, but in reality, there was lots more to it. We went for a really long walk with just the two of us. It's amazing how much more fun the talking was because I wasn't distracted with "is the baby happy/warm". We walked for longer. We got to hold hands instead of both holding the stroller with one hand. We got to clean up at the same time and get ready to go out without pausing in conversation to go tend to the baby.

And then we went out to a brand new pub! For years, this was the big thing we did together - go to the Irish pub downtown. After I started showing, I felt self-conscious about being "that horrible woman who is pregnant in a bar". Despite the fact that I don't drink. It is incredibly smokey, though, and while pregnant, I did worry about smoke inhalation. This new pub has fantastic music, really great food, is no smoking, and is like 7 miles from our house. I got dressed up in my little Dress Stuart kilted skirt (yes it still fits!!), my 3.5 inch heels and off we went! We had a great time on our date.

Our little guy did pretty good with our friend, (who was in heaven!) but he was really glad to see me. He was all cuddly and cute.

Monday morning was incredibly efficient, until the last second. A friend of mine in Texas has recently died of melanoma. While there was no way for me to go to the funeral in Texas, there is a visitation and burial service quite near where I live. I really want to go to that for his wife and son who hopefully will both be at the visitation. This will involve a road trip, however, and we've never done a longish road trip with little Quint. Hubby can't go with me because a standard, yet important, meeting starts at 5pm on Mondays. I hope to pick up Quint this evening, drive for a little over 2 hours, and arrive at the visitation. So this morning I managed to pack into the car....ready?! here we go...

Quint's daycare bag with 4 nipples and 4 bottles.
My breast pump bag to use at work
Quint's standard church baby bag with clothes, diapers, blankets, and the nursing drape.
Rice cereal, bowl and spoon if by some fluke I get to feed him cereal tonight.
A large sack with my lunch things for the week inside,
A bag full of spiral notebooks I was giving to the daycare.
Toys for the drive
My purse.

I manage to get all this done and am only running about 3 minutes late! Wonder of wonders!! I arrive at daycare, and pause to trim all of Quint's nails. He was likely to start scraping himself if they went a day longer. I remembered to tell Priscilla that I've got a road trip tonight, try to feed him after 4:30. After dropping Quint off, I was only running 5 minutes late which, depending on traffic, could be absolutely no big deal. I could still make it to work on time. Woohoo!!

Then I thought about my traveling safely short list. GPS, AAA, gun, phone. S*#! where's my phone! Where IS my phone. I pull over outside of the daycare and go through my coat pockets, the church diaper bag, my purse, and under the seats of my car. Do I really want to take a longish road trip by myself with a baby and no phone....no. So I go back home to look for my phone. I call it about 3 times walking all over the house and past the pile of trash by the curb. Nothing. I remember that I put it on vibrate during the early service at church yesterday. I call it about 3 more times listening extremely closely for a very faint buzzing. Nothing. Tried to call Hubby. Nothing. Finally I have to give up and leave for work - now at least 20 minutes late.

After I got on the highway, I remembered that I took a different purse to the early service at church than to the later service (we played handbells at two services yesterday). So maybe it's in my brown purse.

So as it stands now, if, after I pick up Quint, I can drop by the house and lay my hands on the phone pretty quick, I'll go to the visitation. If it takes me a half hour to find it, and traffic is non-existent, I will arrive about 20 minutes before the visitation ends. If I can find it and leave immediately, but need to stop to nurse the baby on the road, it will cut my visitation short also. If I can find it immediately, and Quint doesn't need to eat before we arrive, I'll get most of an hour to visit! So there are a few things that could still go wrong and prevent me from getting there, but they're not really expecting me. If I have to turn around halfway there and come home, I'll have had a weird night, but not have disappointed anyone but myself.

Wish me luck!

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